My Name is Evan and I am a Procrastinator

I, Evan (INSERT MIDDLE NAME) Lacey am a procrastinator. I actually come from a long line of procrastinators. The first of our line was Lord Edward Lacey the 2^nd, whom left the seeding of the potato fields, in County Leitrim, to the last minute, inadvertently starting the Great Potato Famine of Ireland.

As with many procrastinators, I have rested on the well-known scientific fact that procrastination is genetic and there is currently no cure. All known studies and funding on such a cure were diverted to the Covid-19 Pandemic.

I will always find an excuse. This has been my way of approaching any project that requires the use of 12% of my brain or more. It all started in grade 4. Back then I was a bright and cheery young boy, filled with curiosity, drive and an avid lover of acrylic paints and dinosaurs. Enter the intelligence test

 Myself and 3 other students in our grade had been detected as “gifted,” via a provincial “Intelligence Audit.” As it turns out, the worst thing you can tell a small group of middle class white children is that they are smarter than their peers. My ego was born that day. I, Evan William Lacey, the crown jewel of the Ontario Catholic education system! I need not ever study again, as I learn gooder than the rest. Giving a child this level of hubris at such a young age is setting them up for failure in nearly all aspects of their life. In dramatic contrast to the results that were expected, my grades began to bottom out to mediocre levels. The motivation seemed to leave as quickly as the self-praise came. Why would I ever need to work hard if I was smarter-er?

I feel as though this haunts me, and my task ability to this day. Case and point:

One of the most beautiful rays of light that has peaked through the darkness of the Pandemic is, Thursday night Trivia. 9 friends spread across 3 provinces and time zones tune in to play a “pub style” trivia game every Thursday night. Each week one couple creates new questions so that everyone gets a turn to play and this week it’s our turn. Now, you would think that with an abundance of time on my hands being currently paid to stay home and do relatively nothing, that I would have had this quiz finished, edited and ready for the printers days ago. Yet, here I sit: distracted, stressed and surprised that I have not started.

It only took a pandemic to realize that I am the problem. Even with zero real commitments I am able to put something off to the last minute. At least, if you can call me anything, you can call me consistent. Or a procrastinator. Or Evan! Either way, they say with any problem, the first step it is to admit it. Which, I promise I will get around to sometime this week; there’s just this laundry I’ve been neglecting. Motivation is found within. The trick is letting it out—and at a time like this, who doesn’t want to get out more?

Stay Motivated,

Stay hopeful,

Evan